By Aisha Tariq, Islamabad
You’re walking down the street; loads of people catch your eye, and what’s the first thing that comes to mind? Of course, the first dread impression. You judge them; and even if you’re not aware of it, you still do it subconsciously. It’s kind of like an automatic reaction. “I can’t go anywhere without someone judging me.” Says Britney Spears. Most of us, have this problem and it’s not good! I mean the other person might not know that you’re judging them but it does pollute the environment with negative energy and the only person that it’s damaging is you. These are the main reasons why we judge people.
Insecurities: We all have some things that we don’t like about ourselves, and to compensate for that, we try to pick out faults in others as well.
Scared: Not scared in the literal sense, but some people tend to intimidate us because they are different or they have a quality that you lack. Hence, we try to put them down by judging them.
Appearance: If a person stands out from the crowd, we judge them too. Let’s admit, if we went somewhere and a person walked past who was wearing clothes that were not exactly something you saw every day, then we would label that person and judge him/her. What effect do judgments have?
Perpetuate Stereotypes: The more judgments you throw out there, the more stereotypes it will create and other people might feel the need to “live up” to the expectations of the warped society that we will, eventually, create.
Negativity: It spreads a lot of negativity in this world, because, believe it or not, positive vibes and negative vibes do exist. In the end, your unhappy thoughts will just bring you down; no one else will care.
Encourage You To Judge Yourself: Judging others will result in you judging yourself. For example, if you judge what someone else is wearing, you will pay more attention and be more cautious about your own clothing as well.
Ways To Stop Judging
– Monitor your thoughts. Try to divert your attention every time you feel like judging someone, or passing a crude remark.
– Look for positive things. Being judgmental is a negative thing. Even if you don’t know the person, try to focus on the good points. No one can be all bad, right?
– Stop judging yourself first. The way in which we judge others, is merely a reflection of us. Keep your thoughts positive and focus on the good attributes you have.
– Remember how it feels! It’s not only us judging. “Just remember that when you’re judging the book, the book’s judging you too.” –Stephen King. So, remember what it would feel like if everything you did was being closely scrutinized by another person and you were being judged without much of a reason.
– You don’t know their story. All of us lead different lives, and we all have our own reasons for the choices we make. None of us is perfect, so we do make bad decisions and face the consequences afterwards, which is awful enough in itself. You don’t need people judging you on top of that.
According to a research it is found that slightly behind your right ear, lies the part of your brain that specifically works for thinking about other people’s thoughts. It’s called the temporoparietal junction. This is one of the main reasons why we instantaneously make an impression about someone. To sum it all up, judging helps no one, and only spreads evil in a world that we have already corrupted. Stop judging, and start living!