I am in grade 10 and my bestie(best friend) thinks that her life is meaningless. She thinks that her mother doesn’t love her. She thinks that her younger brother is more important for her mother. She also tried to suicide but she is just 15. Please please tell me how to tell her that mother can’t give her all love to just one kid. As it is our last year in school and I don’t know that what she will do in high school. Please help me out
Dear Sad bestie,
It is really amazing of you to be so concerned for your help. Friendship is all about being with the person in good as well as bad times. Stay with her and give her courage. She needs to look at the positive side of life. There are times when we all feel lost. At home, we see our parents favoring our siblings. At school, we see our teachers preferring certain students. This brings up the feeling of inferiority that your friend is currently going through. Tell her that parents always love all their children equally. While the youngest might get the most attention, acknowledge the fact that little kids require more care as they are in their growing stage of life. Adults however, are seen to be more responsible. Her mother must have took care of her and continues to do that. It is just that at times, we fail to see how are parents are multi-tasking. This period of adolescence goes through a number of changes and mood swings. Tell her to talk to her mother about it. Encourage her to change her approach to life and see how everything is beautiful. After all, she has such a loving and caring bestie like you!
I am a highschooler and I’m already facing best friend problems. I have different classes than her. And I have found some really amazing people there. At first it was all okay. She was okay about the fact that I was friends with them. Then, things started changing. She started getting jealous I guess. She started talking all rudely. We don’t see each other anymore. Maybe she thinks no-one can stand in her way. The main problem is she’s the Head Girl. My friends group even supports her. My new friends want me to get on good terms with my oldie. But, don’t know why, I want to act strong, let my oldie come and talk to me. I just want her to swallow her pride. Because I don’t think friendship allows attitude. When I ask for advises, they say go talk to her, you’ll regret not talking to her. I don’t want to. Because I know she’s going to act like a queen. I can regret this all my life but I just don’t want to get hurt. What should I do?
Dear confused friend,
Too much ego can be bad because it keeps you away from important relationships. Why are you waiting for her to apologize and clear up all the misunderstandings? Be the bigger person and make the move. Even if she gives you a cold shoulder, you will never regret in life. You will never feel that you failed to try. Don’t forget that you guys already spend a great time together. Cherish that and for the sake of those memories, take a move. With time, things change and so does people and relationships. School, College and university will all get your new friends. This does not mean you will leave up on the old ones. This also does not mean that you are not supposed to make new friends. Move on. Talk to her and make her realize. You all can hang around together. If not in person, may be a phone call can solve your problem!